Reconciliation is the best way to define the relationship I have with my hair.
I grew up with my hair natural, living in Washington D.C, which at the time was a very diverse place where I could see myself represented. We then moved to San Antonio, Texas, in a predominantly white neighborhood, which is when I asked my mother to straighten my hair. This was a desperate attempt to fit in, an attempt that has lasted from 12 to 22 years old…
Now adult I can see that this choice was simply a way to turn my back to my roots.
When I decided go back to my natural hair after so much damage I started to question why I didn’t see myself as beautiful.
The negative perception I had of myself had a lot to do with a clear lack of representation, around me but also in the media. Let’s be honest, it’s very hard to be what you can’t see!
Another crucial part of my natural hair journey is learning to appreciate my hair at every stage. When it was just one inch long I loved it. When it grows I love it. When my curls are fresh and poppin' after wash day I love it. And when it gets to wash day and my curls are poofy and tangled I still love it.
When I went natural, I was learning to let go of the idea that my hair has to look a certain way 100% of the time and instead I listen to what my hair wants to do. Because as we know, no two days of curly hair are the same. On Monday it wants to look one way and on Tuesday my curls might be doing something else entirely. None of it is wrong. It doesn't need to be "tamed." I just need to listen and follow my curls!